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the secular ghost

Posted by the lazy knight on 1:16 PM
Last night I had a visitor from the outer world. No not an alien, but a mortal who had presumably descended from heaven (at least that is what I presumed); I could not see any marks of torture on his body. But Quaid e Azam Mohammad Ali Jinnah looked completely forlorn and depressed as he sat on the edge of my bed and poked me into wakefulness. I got up with a start and immediately drew back. My fear was genuine; on many public occasions and during several animated discussions with friends I had torn the poor Quaid to shreds and held him out to be a political opportunist and a communal politician. I thought he had finally had enough and decided to take his revenge.
But the Quaid had something else on his mind. He wanted me to help him. Help? I thought.

‘What is all this your fellow Advani is saying about me?’

‘Why?’ I asked “Aren’t you happy? He sang praises for you?’

‘Praises?’ the Quaid shot back, ‘this man has no understanding of my life or my politics. How can he label me secular? It’s an insult!’

‘Why? Aren’t you pleased with what he said?’

‘Of course not!’ The Quaid was visibly flustered and expressed his consternation in no unclear terms. “How he turn my entire political legacy upside down. That too in my own mausoleum… even though I have stopped living there ever since the ceiling started leaking. But still…it’s my mausoleum and Pakistan is my country.’

I agreed, Pakistan was his country no doubt. But why this irritation with Advani.

‘He is the most devious of all you Indians. Look here he comes into my country and labels me a secularist. Tomorrow he would say I was like Gandhi and Nehru. Then where would be my identity? I fought all my life to remain distinct from them. And then this fellow Advani will become PM and say India and Pakistan are alike because their founding fathers were alike. And then! Allah! He will say India and Pakistan should unite…because we are all secularists at heart and parted only because of those goras!’

‘Ah…’ Jinnah sighed in agony. ‘My beloved Pakistan will be finished’

I suddenly began to see Mr.Advani in a new light. Indeed he would be the new national hero, an international hero; the Nobel Prize would be his for doing the impossible. No wonder all his opponents were so worried.

‘And that commando who thinks he is a General allowed Advani a free run in Pakistan. Help me! Help me!’ pleaded the Quaid.

‘What can I do?’

‘Appeal to your Prime Minister, ask him to keep these dangerous people at home. Help me save my Pakistan. You are at least consistent on your views on me and my country. That is why I came to you for help.’

The Quaid looked visibly distressed by the time his allotted visiting hour was got over. I reassured of him that I would make all possible appeals to the PM to heed the sagely advice of his soul and keep the future of Pakistan in mind. We departed on a cordial note. I had discovered a humane side to the Quaid which I never thought existed before and I made up my mind to vote for Mr.Advani in the next elections.

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